Saturday, December 31, 2011

Friday, December 30, 2011

I got tagged

Nikki Darlin' at Southern Mama with a Bad Mouth tagged me. I'm a lazy bitch and have been laying around all day enjoying the one day of my week a half long vacation that I actually haven't had anything to do! I've been in pajamas all day, it's awesome.

Here are the rules:
 1. Post these rules. 
2. You must post 11 random things yourself.
3. Answer the ques­tions the tag­ger set for you in their post.
4. Cre­ate 11 new ques­tions for the peo­ple you tag to answer.
5. Go to their blog and tell them that you've tagged them.
6. No stuff in the tag­ging sec­tion about ‘you are tagged if you are read­ing this.’ Blah blah blah, you legit­i­mately have to tag 11 peeps!

11 things about myself
  1. I can wiggle my ears
  2. I can touch my nose with my tongue
  3. I can pick stuff up with my toes
  4. I love high heels, but hardly ever wear them
  5. I am a stubborn bitch
  6. I have a potty mouth (like you didn't know lol)
  7. While I was in high school I have serious thought to joining the Coast Guard
  8. I sometimes use Google as spell check
  9. My favorite color is blue
  10. I bite my lip a lot
  11. I'm really, really shy. I know it doesn't seem like it, but I am
Questions from Nikki

  1. What's your favorite TV show? American Horror Story
  2. Who would you say is your hero? I don't think I have one. Fuck it, I'm my own hero!
  3. How would you describe yourself at the age 18? Pretty much the same as I am now. I've always been a rad bitch. Although I will say I'm more confident now.
  4. What's your favorite cartoon? I miss Animaniacs
  5. Where is your dream vacation and why? Ireland, because that place just fascinates me
  6. What's your favorite book and why? Gone with the Wind, because although Scarlett is a selfish bitch, she did what she had to do to survive. You've gotta admire that
  7. What are you most scared of? Something happening to one or both of my kids
  8. What's your favorite thing about blogging? All the people I meet. Most of you are kick ass lol
  9. What/Who got you started in blogging? Way back in the day there was a blog by Rance, nobody knew who he/she was and everybody thought it was a celebrity. I started following the blog and talking to people on there and boom! My blog was born
  10. If you could buy one thing without having to worry about the price, what would it be? Duh, I would go finish my sleeve in a heart beat
  11. What are you wearing right now? NO cheating! LOL. Soccer shorts, a t-shirt and the sweatshirt I stole from J :)
11 Tagged People

Okay, I'm not gonna make it to 11. Nobody's perfect

11 questions from me to you

  1. What is your favorite midnight snack?
  2. If you could go anywhere right now, where would you go?
  3. What is your favorite movie from your childhood?
  4. Do you have any tattoos, and if not do you want to get one?
  5. What is one food that you will not eat under any circumstances?
  6. Current obsession?
  7. Favorite smell?
  8. Something that gives you the giggles every time you see it
  9. What is your favorite flavor of ice cream?
  10. What is your favorite brand of lingerie?
  11. Are you wearing shoes right now?

Thursday, December 29, 2011

Friday Funny

It's getting hard to find funny shit, or I just haven't had time to look for it. How can I be on vacation and not be in my pajamas all day? It's a fucking tragedy.  So here's your funny, because I really did lol. Ha!

Link up your funny stuff and make me laugh.

Friday, December 23, 2011

Friday Funny

Sorry this is so late, but I had a hot man waiting on me this morning and I was incredibly distracted.  Couple that with an afternoon tattoo appointment and well, I lagged. 

This picture made me laugh my ass off.

Merry Christmas!

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Friday Blog Hops

misadventures of a chunky goddess

Go visit these awesome bitches, then stalk my happy ass here





Have a great weekend everybody!

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

Monday, December 19, 2011

Meet Me on Monday

1. Wrapping paper or gift bags?
That depends on the present. If it's an awkward shape, then it goes in a bag.

2.  Real or artificial tree?
Real, but I have an artificial one is storage.

3.  When do you put your tree up?
We just got our tree yesterday.

4.  When do you take your tree down?
Usually a week or so after Christmas.

5.  Do you like eggnog?
No, not really. It's the texture. Kinda gross

6.  Do you have a nativity scene?

7.  Favorite Christmas movie?
A Christmas Story of course! 

8.  Favorite Christmas cookie?
Sugar cookies. I have awesome memories of making them with my aunt.

9.  Where will you eat Christmas dinner?
At my aunt's house.

10.  Angel, bow, or star on top of your tree?

11.  Most annoying thing about this time of year?
The crowds in the stores. I need to be like my friend and start my shopping in May.

12.  Do you like fruitcake?
I don't think I've ever actually eaten fruit cake

13.  What are you most excited about the holidays?
My kids opening their presents.

14.  Do you open presents Christmas Eve or Christmas morning?
It depends on where the kids are. This year we will be opening presents on Christmas Eve

15.  Will you still be wrapping presents on Christmas Eve?
Probably not since my kids are with their dad all week, I'll have plenty of time to wrap presents.

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Friday, December 16, 2011

Friday Blog Hops

misadventures of a chunky goddess

Go visit these hookers and then look me up around the internet.





Friday Funny

Can you believe I almost forgot?! I'm sure you can, so shut your whore mouth and link up something funny!

Pretty please put the button in your post and make sure you're linking up something funny.

Have a good weekend bitches! I'm graduating tomorrow!!!! 

Thursday, December 15, 2011

The Buzz About Me 12

1. Do you like your middle name or are you embarrassed by it?
I'm okay with it. It's pretty plain as far as middle names go.

2.  Have you ever seen a white Christmas?
I think so. It was when I was two, so I'm not 100% sure it was Christmas at the time lol

3.  Looking back, have you accomplished what you wanted to in life up to this point?
Yes, I think I have. 

4.  Do you prefer baking or cooking?
Baking definitely. 

5.  What's the website you think you spend the most time on?
Tumblr or Pinterest. They are the black holes of the internet. They suck you in and you can't escape

Sunday, December 11, 2011

Meet Me on Monday

1.  Tomorrow I'm going to go see the new Sherlock Holmes movie!

2.  Pudding or jello?  Jello. Pudding kinda grosses me out. I have no idea why

3.  What book are you currently reading?  I'm not. Which is really weird.

4.  What is the first concert you went to see?  My parents took me to see Julian Lennon. I have no idea why.

5.  What is your current weather?  Cold!

Friday, December 09, 2011

Friday Blog Hops

misadventures of a chunky goddess

Go visit these awesome hookers and show them some love.

Then come stalk my happy ass all these other places lol

Have a great weekend!

Thursday, December 08, 2011

Friday Funny

Okay, so I just got home from a fire and am in a hurry to get some sleep. Enjoy the funny and link up your funny stuff!

Put the button in your funny post and please make sure you're linking up something funny.

Monday, December 05, 2011

Meet Me On Monday

1. Monday's are necessary if you want to get to Friday.

2.  What is your favorite kind of milkshake?

3.  What monthly bill do you most dislike paying?
My truck payment. Makes me cry every month even though I love my truck.

4.  How many email addresses do you use on a regular basis?
Two. My personal one and my professional one

5.  What color lights are on your Christmas tree?
Our tree isn't up yet, but when I have my own place I always use the clear/white ones. I don't know why I don't like colored lights on my tree.

Saturday, December 03, 2011

Six Word Saturday

I dislike my internal alarm clock.
(is alarm clock one word or two?)

No More Muffin Top Weekend Blog Hop

misadventures of a chunky goddess

Click on the button and visit this awesome hooker. 

Then spend your Saturday following me all over the internets



The Twitter


Thursday, December 01, 2011

Friday Funny

We made it through another week and I'm sure we can all use a beer and a laugh, so link up your funny shit.  As long as it makes us laugh, then link up your post! 

I only have one rule, it must be a Friday Funny. If it isn't, I will delete the link and mock you endless throughout the wide world of social media.

Okay, I lied. Two rules. Please put the button on your post. 

Have a great weekend bitches!

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Wordless Wednesday

Marvelous Mommy

I'm linking up with Marvelous Mommy for Wordless Wednesday.

Monday, November 28, 2011

Meet Me on Monday

1. I really need to clean my truck. It hasn't been washed in months.

2.  What food makes you think of Christmas?  Tamales. We don't have turkey or ham, we have tamales.

3.  If you could choose to stay a certain age forever, what age would it be?  I don't think I'd do that. I think we learn something every year we grow older and that's what makes getting older fun. You have 365 chances to not screw it up again.

4.  What was your first paying job?  Babysitting. I started babysitting when I was 12. 

5.  Have you read the Twilight series?  Yes I have. It's a good story, but I'm not going crazy over it or the movies.

Friday, November 25, 2011

Friday Funny 11/25

If you're out shopping today, you're fucking crazy.  You're supposed to do that shit on Christmas Eve like normal people. Haha!

I'm out in the desert drinking and chasing my kids on a quad.  See you bitches when I get back.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

The Buzz About Me 11

1. As a child, did you have one item/toy that you were attached to?  Yep, I had my blanky lol. I wore that thing to shreds and then my mom had to find me a new one. I still have one actually, lol. Only now I can go to work without it. Ha!

2.  What would you consider to be your top three favorite holidays?  Halloween, Christmas, and Thanksgiving

3.  What is your earliest memory? Somebody filled my dad's truck with balloons and I remember them falling out all over the driveway. I was 2.

4.  Name three features about yourself that you think are sexy.  Wow, um okay let's see. My intelligence, my sense of humor, and my eyes.

5.  What was your very first pet?  A dog. Stacey. I tried to name her after my mom so she would let me keep her, but she didn't want a dog named after her. Lol, I wonder why?

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Meet Me on Monday

1. I wish I had more time to blog. Lately I haven't had time to read blogs or post.

2.  What is your favorite kind of soup?  Potato soup

3.  Where will you eat Thanksgiving dinner?  Out in the desert lol. We camp for Thanksgiving.

4.  What is your favorite time of day?  When I get home and can actually relax.

5.  Did you start Christmas shopping yet?  Nope. I had to wait for my money to show up from child support. Thieving bastards.

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Six Word Saturday

Super busy week. Glad it's over.

No More Muffin Top Blog Hop

misadventures of a chunky goddess

So I'm late, but in my defense I have been busy with work and life and working the fat off of my ass.

Jillian Michaels is making me her bitch on a daily basis and the workouts are more important than posting.  Enough excuses! Click the button and check out this awesome  chick then find me here:






Have a great weekend!

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Wordless Wednesday

Marvelous Mommy

I just love the toddler's facial expression. Priceless

Sunday, November 13, 2011

Music Monday - Songs with Color


The a couple of the videos have naughty words in them so you may want to have the kids leave the room!

This song is just awesome. It makes me laugh every time I hear it.

I wonder if I still have this cd around somewhere. I just remembered how much I like this song.

We need some rock n' roll to get us going today!

This one has naughty words too! But Pink is so awesome.

Shit I Hate Sunday

Shit I Hate . . . . the shit schedule I have at work. 12 hour days and I'm only getting paid for 6. Fucking lame

Shit I Hate . . . . that Advil doesn't work instantly. Waiting for this shit to kick in sucks cooter.

Shit I Hate . . . . creepy old men in bars. Seriously dude, you have no game. Buy me a beer and fuck off.

Shit I Hate . . . . having to buy my own beer. Ha!

Shit I Hate . . . . . my dad buying an electric guitar for the kids to play. Holy fuckballs, I don't care that it's after 10am. Do I really need to hear this kid crank it to 11? It's too early for rock n' roll. Auntie is hungover bitches.

Shit I Hate . . . . that the case, screen protector, and car charger for my new phone is taking 3 weeks to get here. Note to self: check where they're shipping from. Tokyo is really fucking far away

Now go link up the shit you hate!

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Friday, November 11, 2011

Look Alike Friday

Mrs. Monologues

I don't see it, but people always tell me I look like her.

Maybe if I hadn't plucked my eyebrows into oblivion we might look more alike. Hahaha

Friday Funny 11/18

Sorry this is late hookers, but this week has absolutely kicked my ass. Enjoy and link up!

Friday Blog Hops

misadventures of a chunky goddess

Go stalk these awesome bitches and then hunt my ass down here:



Have a great weekend!

Friday Funny

I get a three day weekend bitches! I love this month, so much time off from work. Sadly none of it is paid time off.  Oh how I dream of a job that pays decently and has benefits. Maybe after I get my Master's Degree. I still need a laugh though, so link up your funny shit.

Please remember that if it's not a Friday Funny I will delete your link and spend my day off mocking you.

Also presented for your amusement, I attempted to make a button but I can't get the fucker to work. I am an idiot with 3 college degrees.  Book smart doesn't always equal intelligent. Ha! Now I have to wait for Rockin' Mama to wake up and fix my shit because she is a blogging genius. I owe you boob pics, cupcakes, and beer bitch.

Thursday, November 10, 2011

The Buzz About Me 10

1. The last thing you was a Skinny Cow ice cream sandwich. Not for breakfast, although it is tempting. 

2.  The last thing you purchased.  Gas for my truck. I'm a broke bitch. I have to make sure I can get to work.

3.  The last thing you did before going to bed last night.  Read a chapter in Catching Fire. I need to get the third book in the Hunger Games series.

4.  The last song you heard.  Take My Drunk Ass Home by Eric Church

5.  The last show you were watching.  American Horror Story

6.  The last person you called.  My food stamps worker, and the bastard hasn't called me back. Guess who's getting a nasty phone call today!

7.  The last person you received a text from.  My mom. Lol, she was texting me from downstairs about the CMAs last night.

8.  The last color nail polish you wore.  Electric blue

9.  The last place you were before going home.  Work

10.  The last time you did something for yourself.  A couple of weeks ago when I went and got my new tattoo. Sure I could have used the money for something else, but mama needed some new ink!

Wednesday, November 09, 2011

Music Monday


I love it.

"It's always your favorite sins, that do you in."

OMG! I LOVE IT! Excuse me, I must go shopping on iTunes

I took a break from MMMM during December because, (brace yourself) I don't like Christmas music. Just not a fan.

Wordless Wednesday

NapTime MomTog


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